I’m talking about writing mistakes made in mystery books in general and cozy mysteries in particular here. This comes up because of a cozy mystery I read a day or two ago.

Now, I do realize that cozy mysteries aren’t considered fine literature, but every book requires a certain amount of effort and polish. We won’t get everything right, especially if we’re self-publishing and don’t have deep enough pockets to hire an editor. However, some mistakes are worse than others and many mistakes are avoidable.

This book that I read made a startling number of basic errors. I recognized many of them as things I’d either done myself or had been cautioned against. I felt for this author; writing is so worthwhile but isn’t easy. So, I started to leave a detailed review listing the things that could be fixed because I quite honestly wanted to try and help. Fortunately, I very quickly caught myself and remembered that their sales page on Amazon isn’t the place for that sort of advice.

How to help?

I didn’t have contact information for this person, they didn’t ask for my help, and I know it’s only a matter of time before other reviewers hand them their own backside, so I left it. But I really felt motivated to share a few tips that I’ve learned along the way.

Of course I make my share of mistakes too, but I’ve had some issues and potential errors pointed out to me and it was hugely helpful. So, I’m writing this post in hopes that it will help a few other authors, or aspiring authors, to avoid some embarrassing mistakes.

I won’t be naming names but I’m going to touch on some of the bigger flubs from the book I read. I beg your pardon in advance, I will be speaking pretty critically here. Please bear in mind that it’s all in hopes of learning from and avoiding the errors.

Continuity

This is very important, and if you get it wrong you look like a numpty. The classic trope of the detective warning off the amateur sleuth is well established. But it still has to be fully written into the book if you’re going to use it.

In the example book, the small town cop uses the classic ‘Let me do the investigating’ line. Not inventive but it does the job. The problem is, the protagonist had done nothing at this point but sit in her cafe and fret. The warning came across as odd, unwarranted and pointless.

A bigger gaffe was when another character’s name changed entirely and inexplicably midchapter. Ruth suddenly turned into Robin, (names have been changed to protect the innocent) and she was Robin for the rest of the book. It spoils the atmosphere and any sense of intrigue when you have to go back and re-read sections to ensure you didn’t miss the introduction of a new character.

Consistency, accuracy and 4 words that changed my life

“But they had chicken.”

That was the politely bemused comment from Lauren, a very kind and long-suffering editor. In my first cozy mystery, Murder Checks Inn, there’s a scene that involves the mention of tacos. But, due to some rewrites, a scene in which the family is eating fried chicken ended up leading into the taco discussion.

I was both amused by my dumb mistake and chilled that neither myself nor my regular beta reader had caught it. Despite multiple readings. As a result, I learned to watch for those sorts of inconsistencies.

For instance

Going back to the example book, there was a sudden and completely random mention of a break-in at the protagonist’s cafe. I thought a chapter had somehow fallen out of my tablet. I went back a few pages, I even did a search for ‘break-in’, there was no break-in to be found. My guess is that the author had planned to add that in to pad out the plot and simply forgot. As a reader, that knocks you out of the story.

More subtle examples were someone calling her by name when they had no way of knowing what it was, and she had instant knowledge and recognition of something relatively obscure with no explanation of how she knew it. She also told the police that another character had made a statement about a suspect that they never made. The conversation was written out in full and the potentially damning statement never happened.

It’s important to pay attention to all details, but especially if they’re part of your clues.

Build authentic tension

I’ll be honest, this annoyed the heck out of me. The heroine was a hot mess throughout. I am not exaggerating when I say that virtually every single page made reference to her being in a state of anxiety or outright panic. This started well before the crime even took place.

It was exhausting to read and it was obnoxiously repetitive. She felt a knot in her chest, she felt a knot in her stomach, her pulse raced, her heart raced, her thoughts raced, her mind raced. Every page.

Make the reaction fit the scene

Her reactions were not only described in roughly the same terms (you need to shake it up a bit), but they were out of proportion to the situation. You really want to have a good reason for a panicked or terrified reaction.

This character did not. She was at someone else’s house and they had a knock at the door. She couldn’t see who it was. This alone was enough to reduce her to a pant-wetting level of terror.

This stood out rather awkwardly because the author didn’t fully build the scene. They created very little atmosphere and used the same vague descriptions to try and build tension. It didn’t work. You can’t rely solely on saying your character is afraid; that won’t scare your readers. You need to give them a reason to be scared, tense or whatever feeling you’re trying to create.

Sleuths need to investigate something

Actually investigate. That doesn’t mean they need to carry a fingerprinting kit but they need to do something. They need to have useful conversations, a little snoop, a little eavesdrop. Something.

The extent of the investigating in this book was the main character asking the same person the same couple of questions at least 3 times. Each time she told herself she needed to be subtle, blundered in like a drunken elephant anyway, and got the same unrevealing response. And yet, each time, she insisted that she was getting closer to the truth.

After that, she looked at a patch of dirt and found nothing. She was then told to beware of small towns by some random passerby. She then spoke to another character (the inscrutable name-changer mentioned earlier) who told her absolutely nothing useful. But again, we’re assured that ‘the mystery is getting more complex’. Actual statement from the book.

Why it’s important

If you’re putting forth the premise that your mild-mannered protagonist is capable of solving a mystery, you must give them some useful qualities. Consider even giving them a quirk or skill that sets them apart.

In my series, for example, my main character has an incredible memory and a skill for getting people to talk. That’s just my little niche. I read another series where the main character was a retired spy and used those skills to solve crimes.

Do your own thing and, by all means, make your characters blow it on occasion. That adds to the fun. But they have to be at least semi-competent or your readers might get frustrated and lose interest.

Find better ways to increase the story length

That book was really too long for what was happening in it, there just wasn’t enough meat on the bone. So, unless you want to write a short story, you’re probably going to need more than one plot point.

It is technically true that an author can increase their word count by constantly reminding everyone of their character’s sweaty moistness and alarming heartrate. But they will be called to account for such brazenly repetitive writing. Discerning reviewers will read enough of that kind of book to become deeply angry. They will then find the author and eat them.

A safe and non-cannibalistic alternative is subplots. Other things can happen, whether it’s impacting your main character or people around them. You can tie it in to the main plot if it fits, but make it interesting enough that people will want to know what happens.

This is an instance where avoiding the first-person narrative can really help. You can switch viewpoint and have things happen without having to come up with a reason for the main character to always be in the room. That is a deeply personal style choice, however.

The importance of the reader’s experience

Put it this way, all the things I’ve mentioned that went wrong in this book, all of them, happened by the 35% mark. At that point I gave up.

I skipped to the end to see how it ended and, honestly, it was disappointing. The villain was the most obvious suspect. And they were so transparently guilty that it was in the realm of mustache-twirling. Then it got more annoying as half the community actually sided with the villain. That was certainly a different twist, but not one that I enjoyed.

There was then, in what felt a bit like an afterthought, a tinge of romance. Now, I really love romance, I’m not complaining about it. The cop commended her for how gracefully she handled the whole ordeal, they had a moment and it was all very nice.

The inconsistency was that the sleuth wasn’t portrayed as handling things gracefully. The author seemed to be trying to convey that she was barely holding it together throughout. It contradicted the narrative, so the love interest’s admiration ended up sounding hollow. Personally, I would have rather they’d acknowledged that she nearly lost it repeatedly but survived the ordeal.

Summing up

If you’re writing a book, or are in any point of the plotting stages, here are some important things to keep in mind.

• Continuity and consistency are vital. Make sure character names and appearances stay consistent throughout. If your character is a blonde named Mary, don’t let her mysteriously morph into a redhead named Gert.
  
  
• Build tension. You can’t just tell someone ‘this scene is really scary’ and think the job is done. Describe the atmosphere in terms that make it sound tense or somehow unsafe.
  It’s good to describe how your character is feeling but that can’t be the only ingredient in the stew. Ambient sounds, temperature, expression, lighting, there are many ways to set a scene.
  
  
• Give your characters something worthwhile to do. If they don’t investigate, they’re not really a sleuth, they’re just some shmo that happens to be hanging around while things happen.
  Write conversations that go somewhere or establish something. Look at a scene and ask yourself if it serves a purpose or furthers the plot. If it doesn’t, take a harder look and ask yourself if it should even be there.
  
  
• Add subplots if you want to write a longer book. The book I’ve been discussing here probably would have done well as a novella. There wasn’t enough happening to fill the 170 or so pages that it took up. It could’ve been tightened up and would have been a nicer read.
  Like I said, I got to the 35% mark before I threw in the towel, that’s 60-ish pages. There was no subplot introduced by that point and, if one came later, it was really too late.
  
  

Crafting an enjoyable mystery is worth the effort

So, there we have it. A brief overview of a few foundation-level mistakes that you can spot and avoid. Things like changing names (or spellings), irrelevant conversations and sleuths that don’t sleuth are signs of an inexperienced author.

Every author needs a bit of help now and then. A good editor would spot all the issues we’ve discussed and many more besides. If you’re interested in what sort of value an editor can bring to your book, check out my post on whether a professional edit is worthwhile.

In the meantime, there are many other writing perils that a writer can spot for themselves. I discuss some of these tips and tricks in my post on self-editing. For now, I hope this information helps you to sniff out some of those pesky errors that hide in plain sight.